


never kissed goodbye (the love of our lives)

by minna



Category: Homestuck
Genre: HSO 2012 Round 1, Multi, Sibling Incest, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-23
Updated: 2012-07-23
Packaged: 2017-11-10 13:35:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/466887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minna/pseuds/minna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>DAVE: man i dunno if i learned anything about this game its that itll take any opportunity to mess with us<br/>ROSE: There may be something to that theory, paranoid and delusional as it may appear at first blush.<br/>TEREZI: DO YOU R34LLY W4NT TO B3 STUCK H3R3 FOR3V3R JUST 1N C4S3?  SOM3T1M3S YOU'V3 JUST GOT TO T4K3 4 CH4NC3!</p>
            </blockquote>





	never kissed goodbye (the love of our lives)

**Author's Note:**

> With thanks to Team Knightwatch; especially Artillie who offered up her stellar beta skills, without which this would have been a great deal less readable.
> 
> This story was written for HSO 2012, and submitted as the Round 1 Dave♥Rose♥Terezi [entry](http://hso2012-r1.dreamwidth.org/19324.html).

DAVE: i got a bad feeling is all  
ROSE: We don't have much in the way of a choice, Dave.  
TEREZI: YOU'R3 B31NG R1D1CULOUS  
DAVE: objection  
DAVE: can't a guy get a girl who's on his side every now and then  
TEREZI: A GUY SHOULD L34RN TO C4LL UPON TH3 COURT ONLY WH3N H3 1S CORR3CT 1F H3 W1SH3S FOR TH3 COURT TO 4GR33 W1TH H1M!

You wake up in the dark of early morning (04:02:57) feeling...dislocated. Years from the mugginess of Houston at this time of year, and months from even the cold bottled quality of meteor air, but for all you've been at Rainbow Falls more than long enough to be used to it, the crisp air tastes odd in your mouth. Unfamiliar. Rose is still fast asleep, curled tight on the other side of the bed; one arm shoved firmly beneath the pillow, other flung out towards you, half-curled fingers just short of your face. That's off as well, in its own way; Rose Lalonde hadn't taken long to prove herself a closet snuggler, but its going on weeks since you've woken up with hair in your mouth or the weight of a leg across your own.

The room is changed from what it was when you first saw it through the sBurb viewport; the posters are missing, trinkets removed from the top of the bookshelf. The only personal notes are your sunglasses, sitting half-folded and haphazard on the desk and her bracelet beside it, carefully laid out with its clatter of tacky Libra charms all facing the same way, haphazard mix of fake diamonds and real opals. The few that are high quality enough to remain untarnished glimmer in the moonlight.

You turn over slowly, carefully, but she still stirs a little before settling back down with a small sigh. You rest a hand gently on swell of her hip beneath the blanket. There's still no gray hand for yours to rest atop, and you curl your fingers against their lack.

JOHN: why would there only be one unless there's only one universe? you're being dumb.  
DAVE: man i dunno if i learned anything about this game its that itll take any opportunity to mess with us  
ROSE: There may be something to that theory, paranoid and delusional as it may appear at first blush.  
TEREZI: DO YOU R34LLY W4NT TO B3 STUCK H3R3 FOR3V3R JUST 1N C4S3?  
TEREZI: SOM3T1M3S YOU'V3 JUST GOT TO T4K3 4 CH4NC3.

You wake a second time at 9:41(:59) to an empty room, sun warm on your face and too hot on your legs beneath the blanket. Rose's bracelet is missing and your sunglasses are now neatly folded and sit precisely atop the closed laptop, smudges of the previous day gone from the glass. You stare at them for probably far too long; some time in the last few years you've fallen into the habit of waking up anywhere between 'slowly' and 'dead'; today is a solid '3 headshots before you get out of the loading screen'.

A breakfast plate waits for you in the fridge when you get to the kitchen; weird pumpkin hash browns with cold bacon and eggs, which you eat standing next to the sink before trooping through to the lab.

Dirk and Jade look up from their poring over blueprints, which are spread across every available space not already taken up by the hulking metal framework or its various accoutrements. Jake waves cheerily from...whatever the fuck he's doing on his creepy ass skulltop, sitting beside Rose who doesn't look up from the book she's curled herself around on the weird pink bed shoved into the corner of the room. There's knitting in her lap, a few rows threaded around brightly banded needles -no more or less than the last time you saw it, before you finished the Game. The yarn has an odd sheen to it, not quite the preservative shine and jewelled tone of alchemised-with-gushers; it's a dusky bluish-green, alchemised all the same.

morning sleepyhead!   
anything i can do or you got all the nerd cooks you need  
guess i can head to town  
bring home the bacon   
There's a list in the kitchen.   
itll be good for you anyway  
get out of the house  
see the sun!!   
yeah yeah whatever  
sure there isnt anything i can do though  
im a great book holder   
goooooooooooo

You go.

JOHN: well i still think you're being dumb, but we'll both grab it at the same time just in case okay?  
JOHN: on the count of three: team friendleader, grab!  
KARKAT: YOU'RE AN IDIOT  
JOHN: haha fuck you too

This isn't the first time you've made the trip alone, but it's still rare enough that you try to revel in the peace of no constant chatter or uncomfortable silence. It's not a bad drive, small roads through forest and then a stretch of dead west on the highway. Not that you've driven anywhere else; your ectoparents do a damn impressive forgeries, but you're a little too nervous to chance it. Can't afford to waste any more luck than necessary.

The actual shopping takes a little longer than usual since they're adding something that needs semi-obscure wiring that you end up needing help to locate, but even with that you've got the car loaded with everything you could possibly need inside an hour and a half.

You're back in official parkland before your brain throws up a big red 'nope' and you pull over on the side of a dinky little road, suddenly as reluctant to return as you were to leave in the first place; as much as the house verges on 'comically oversized', months of kicking around with nothing to do while everyone else was busy with astrophysics and cryptic proclamations or Providing a daily dose of hope to a glum situation! has shrunken it considerably. Jane and Roxy skipped out to Washington weeks back, and sitting on the hood of the car in the middle of some godforsaken forest, you almost wish you'd tagged along.

(Only almost, though, for Roxy's conviction that commenting on your ttly choice ass was hilarious if no other reason.)

\-- turtechGodhead [TG]  starts pestering  tentacleTherapist [TT]  at 13:28 --

TG: hate to say it but i think im getting tired of the bodunk life

\--  tentacleTherapist [TT] is an idle chum! --

TG: we should go sightseeing or something  
TG: pick a city hop a plane  
TG: think of it like a road trip but less staring at landscape  
TG: fuck landscape anyway ooh look a rock wow its water  
TG: are we there yet no kids its sixty more miles before we stand around looking at a fucking big tree the excitement never stops  
TG: you like monuments right  
TG: how about we go statue of liberty thats not far  
TG: we can even get those weird foam hats the kids seem to like these days  
TG: and by kids i mean dipshit tourists but hey when in tourist traps  
TG: though youve probably already seen that one i guess  
TG: so how about vegas  
TG: i mean think about it  
TG: it has basically every weird statue worth seeing except in neon  
TT: Have you even left? Aren't you supposed to be shopping?  
TG: why would i be pestering you from across the house  
TG: that doesnt even make sense  
TT: And yet you indulge in doing so with monotonous regularity.  
TG: haha true  
TG: but seriously theres like two stores in this town  
TG: its not like shopping takes long  
TG: so cmon vegas what do you say  
TT: Is this some long-game attempt to convince me to 'blow your dice' in public? TT: In which case I suppose my answer is "ooh, Mister Strider, ooh ".  
TG: damn straight ooh  
TG: ain't gonna be a single man in the whole place won't be jealous of my good luck charm ma'am  
TG: at least try to shed a subdued tear while the old hands yell snake eyes   
TT: Isn't snake eyes a losing throw?  
TG: fuck i dont know  
TG: its all sports to me 

\--  tentacleTherapist [TT] went offline at 13:47 --

In a little while, you'll head back in and sit around in a diner for a few hours, but it's late enough in the year to be getting warm again so for the moment you just keep sitting on the hood of the car and looking at the trees.

This is the longest response you've had from her in days, and that's a revelation you're not quite sure what to do with.

Congratulations, HEROES. You have WON THE GAME.  
All of the troll players appear to be FADING!  
  
KARKAT: WHY THE FUCK DID YOU LET GO?  
JOHN: im holding it!!  
  
Please stand by, you will now be transported out of s  
  
JOHN: wow fuck this  
JOHN: jade catch  
JADE: wait what -  
  
John has GRABBED KARKAT'S ARM, and is ALSO FADING.  
What will you do?  
> Dave: run for Terezi  
  
You FAIL to reach Terezi.  
Welcome to your NEW UNIVERSE

You pull up to the house pretty late (23:19:46). The light out front has been left on for you, though nobody is around to help unload the car. It doesn't take long to get everything packed away in the kitchen. You leave the bag of techy shit on the table; nights where both Dirk and Jade managed to drag themselves back to the rooms they'd actually claimed instead of passing out on top of the creepy disney princess bed in the corner are uncommon enough that you'd probably wake someone up, and also fuck trekking all the way down to the lab, it's cold as balls in there.

You hit the lights as you go through, and it's only about a half hour (23:54:16) by the time you get to the bedroom where Rose is still awake for once, humming to herself, swaying with a glass in one hand. A half-empty bottle of wine sits on the coffee table, another full glass beside it.

Her hair is curling against her neck -not as wet as it would be if she had actually washed it, just steam dampened -and she's wearing one of the dresses she's modified from her mother's collection. It's light material, and gives the impression of floating down from her hips, swishing against her legs. Her bare feet sink into the carpet a little.

She's beautiful.

She beckons you over, and presses the glass into your hands.

so just out of interest is there some sort of rule  
i hear the crockers got the other lalonde straightened out  
like space except instead of vacuums natures all touchy about its lalondes and total sobriety

She waves you off lazily, takes a deep draught, and resumes swaying.

some sort of highlander deal then  
there can be only one  
Did you forget the vagaries of ectobiology, Dave? You're as Lalonde as I am.

She clinks her glass to yours, metal chiming against the side. There's a soft, greenish smudge across the inside of her wrist from the copper, and you drink obligingly.

maybe i should get you a thing  
A thing? How delightful of you.  
what can i say youre a classy broad i do what i can  
green isnt your colour  
And why, precisely, would you do that?  
maybe i just want to get in on the party  
past couple of days it feels like ive lost both of you

She goes very still. You think for a moment you've misjudged, that she's going to be confused, deny the distance you've both built up. Finally, she smiles to herself.

So you've finally deigned to notice, have you? I've momentarily distracted the poor, beleaguered Dave Strider from his mourning vigil. God forbid anyone grieve without your hand in it.

Seventeen sees you gangling and awkward still, but she's untouchable. She just reaches your cheekbone but seems taller somehow, lips pale, refusing to look at you.

wow okay wait what the fuck are we even talking about right now  
What are we talking about? Why, nothing important. Perhaps the fact that I have had to tread so very lightly these past few months lest I steal thunder from the depths of your emotion. You wake most nights reaching for her, but would you like to know what haunt me, Dave?  
I lay awake thinking of what may have happened had you reached her in time.  
That I would have been left entirely alone, forgotten by the 'cool kids'.  
oh fuck no  
rose  
please  
its not like that  
Isn't it?  
You made your choice-

She cuts off, stepping away hastily as you reach for her; closes her eyes, takes a single, studied breath before opening them and starting again, this time with an enforced calm.

You made your choice, and don't you dare to presume I failed to notice.  
That's what I remember, Dave. I remember you running for her.  
Away from me.

jesus fucking christ lalonde  
im the knight remember  
big dumb meathead all chivalry no brainery  
you think i wouldnt have run for you as well  
well I would have  
youre acting like the idea of getting through doesnt wake me up just as often  
because it does  
context matters  
this isnt grade school where ill be all oh well rachel is my first best friend cos ive known her the longest and tahnee is my second best friend except in summer then its alicia  
her parents have a pool man  
shits important  
You're getting off point.  
okay sorry  
im just saying its not like a favourites thing or anything  
i assumed youd be right with me  
I didn't notice what was going on until it was too late.

You recognise the shape of guilt in her mouth, the weight of it, an uncomfortable twin to your own.

so why didnt you say anything  
Because, Dave, it has been three months of wounded eyes into middle distance and walking off alone and 'not wanting to talk about it.'  
Pray, how I could have said anything when you literally walked away every time any of them were mentioned even in passing?

She's finally looking at you. You don't try reaching for her again, but it's difficult -tears were far from a staple in the Strider household, and the fading anger in the set of her jaw doesn't do much to stop the sucker punch of the glimmer on her eyelashes.

you know i didnt write a single line of shitty knock-off byronic poetry  
What a terrible waste. I bet you didn't cry yourself to sleep listening to Morrissey even once.  
guilty  
She was -she is -mine too, Dave.  
i know

Finally, slowly, she puts the glass down and reaches for you, folds herself into your arms. Her nose is cold beneath your ear.

so whats goin on in there anyway  
Truthfully? Jade and our illustrious father-  
babe seriously i will pay you to never call him that again  
-spend their time arguing about flux capacitors and stabilising wormholes while Jake bounces between them like a flip-over puppy.  
i thought they got on pretty well  
They do, really. It's just the nervousness of being so close, I think. The Crocker-Lalonde household lands tomorrow.  
hold the fuck up  
do they seriously call them flux capacitors

She smiles against your neck.

I'm sure I don't know. It's all sports to me.

*

The next few days are a lot calmer for the two of you, and you get in quite a few solid hours of preparatory vandalism on Mom Lalonde's collection of shitty airport murder mysteries curled up against each other in the loungeroom. Jake mostly disappears outside; hunting, if Rose's snarky reminders about national parks and hunting seasons are anything to go by.

\--  gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering  turntechGodhead [TG] at 21:01 --

GG: dave!!  
GG: dave dave dave dave dave  
GG: daaaaaaaaaaave!  
TG: holy shit harley keep your pants on  
TG: what  
GG: get everyone down here!!! :D :D :D   
TG: are you sure  
TG: what happened to "unless you learned astrophysics last night you cant help and also youre giving me the creeps so go away >:B!!"  
TG: i wouldnt want to disobey the posted instructions  
TG: itd be gogdamn anarchy up in here   
GG: ugh ill take it down okay just get up here  
GG: its done!   
TG: are you serious   
GG: pretty sure!!!  
TG: what do you mean pretty sure  
TG: pretty sure and yes are two different things harley  
TG: dont fuck with me on this i dont think either of us can take a false alarm   
GG: ooh look at me im a derse dreamer  
GG: time to wear purple and be stupidly fatalistic about everything all the time!!  
GG: im sure okay? super super sure  
GG: so come on  
GG: you two can go back to your weird moping routine later once your girlfriends here to deal with it  
GG: or not cos i guess you'll be too busy ;)  
GG: dealing with it ;)   
TG: gasp what are you trying to imply  
TG: we arent that kind of girl  
GG: ;) ;) ;)   
TG: haha okay we are  
TG: shit gtg gotta tell rose and possibly shed a single crystal tear into a monogrammed handkerchief  
TG: give us like two minutes  
GG: okay see you soon! :D :D :D

\--  gardenGnostic [GG] ceased pestering  turntechGodhead [TG] at 21:09 --

In a moment you'll book it over there, ready to fly headlong through the slowly widening crack in space as soon as you catch sight of burned out eyes and a shark smile. But first, you reach out and take Rose's hand.

so this is it huh  
you gonna blow my dice after all  
I looked it up, you know. Snake eyes.  
okay cool  
spill  
It's almost universally a loss.  
well shit lalonde  
you mean to tell me ive been placing my bets wrong this whole time  
Oh, I don't know that I'd say that. It goes by another name as well.  
oh yeah  
whats that  
The dog's throw.

You both hold your breath as Jade raises her hand to the control panel, ready to roll the dice.

Snake eyes.


End file.
